" THE COST OF HEALING"
Luke 8:26-39
Rev. Gary Paterson
June 20, 2010
Throughout the centuries, until quite recently in fact, the Church Fathers and Mothers (yes, there were some), along with Rabbis and Biblical scholars all believed that a literal interpretation of Scripture was the least interesting and helpful way of engaging the Bible, and they were always quick to turn to metaphor, allegory and symbol in order to enrich their understanding of a passage, a way to keep ancient stories alive and meaningful. A story like today’s Gospel reading of Jesus’ exorcism of an evil spirit cries out for this approach, so we that we do not get bogged down in whether or not we believe in “real” demons; or whether we should be critical of this first century way of understanding mental illness and/or epilepsy; or whether having 500 pigs run over a cliff to their death in the waters below constitutes unusual cruelty to animals, and we should be alerting the SPCA.
It’s much more interesting and helpful, I think, to understand demons symbolically – not as a way of diminishing their power, far from it; but rather, as a way of provoking us to recognize how the demons are alive and well in our own lives, in the world, whether they are working from the outside it, or from the inside out. In preparing for today, I actually went back to an old “demon sermon” – not to avoid work by using an “oldie goldie,” but rather as a way of checking out what I said “back then.” I was intrigued by my efforts to discover the “language of equivalency” as I searched for different ways of talking about demons in modern settings. One could start with some of the overarching issues of our times, the kind that work from the outside in…. like racism, as we ponder what the members of the Truth and Reconciliation Committee will discover as they listen to the stories of what took place in the Indian Residential Schools; or like homophobia, as we hear about two men being gay-bashed last week, here in downtown Vancouver, indeed, at the very door of their home on Keefer Street.
Or perhaps it’s more helpful to personalize it, by talking about addictions, the classics of alcohol, drugs and gambling, but in our times, include sexual fantasy, eating, shopping and work -- ah yes, work until you drop. Thus, demons can be understood as those compulsions or patterns of behaviour that have too strong a grip upon our lives, that control us, rather than the other way around. Or perhaps we can see demons lurking in the world of abuse, the trauma, the shame, in hurt that leaks out sideways despite all efforts to suppress and forget, until we slide into dysfunctions we know not what to do with.
Or we could talk about our more every day neuroses, --avoidance, performance, no self-esteem; or maybe anxiety, or the exhaustion of depression. Or maybe the demons might be understood as the illusions and prejudices that blind us to what is really happening around us, and to us, joined with a “not-my-fault” or “there’s-nothing-I-can-do” attitude so that change is effectively blocked. Or we could talk in explicitly religious language, and name the seven deadly sins… pride, anger, greed, sloth, lust, envy, gluttony. Now that’s a list I can identify with. Demons, eh?
Or listen to this poem, “After the Pyre,” and tell me if you don’t hear demons crawling all around, outside and inside… violent, and then insidious. It’s written by Li-Young Lee, an Asian-American poet, whose family emigrated from China to Indonesia, and then fled to the United States. Watch what happens to him, and at the end… well, listen:
It turns out, what keeps you aliveas a child at mid-centuryfollowing your parents from burningvillage to cities on fire to a country at warwith itself and anyonewho looks like you,what allows you to pass through smoke,through armed mobs singing the merits of a new regime, tooth for a tooth,liberation by purification, and globaldissemination of the love of jealous gods,coup d'etat, coup de grace, and the cooing of mothersand doves and screaming menand children caught in the pyre's updraft,what keeps you safe even among your own,the numb, the haunted, the maimed, the barely alive,tricks you learned to become invisible,escapes you perfected, playing dead, playingstupid, playing blind, deaf, weak, strong,playing girl, playing boy, playing native, foreign,in love, out of love, playing crazy, sane, holy, debauched,playing scared, playing brave, happy, sad, asleep, awake,playing interested, playing bored, playing broken,playing "Fine, I'm just fine," it turns out,. .now that you're olderat the beginning of a new century,what kept you aliveall those years keeps you from living.
It’s that final verse that grabs me, demands that I think of my own life:
now that you're olderat the beginning of a new century,[now that everything around you has changed, asking for different responses, you find yourself using the same patterns, answers, solutions, behaviours, even though you begin to suspect, that}what kept you aliveall those years keeps you [now] from living.
A preacher can get carried away with the naming of demons… if you make the list long enough, then just about everybody is going to have an “aha” moment, and find that a couple of demons have made themselves right at home in your life. I wondered about inviting us to sit silently for a while, taking stock maybe, thinking about those things, both inside and out, that drive us into a ways of living that are not good for us, for our neighbour, or for the world. That’s worth thinking about, because when you name a demon, then you actually get some power over it; maybe not a lot, but by knowing who or what you’re dealing with, you open the possibility of change. So name what you think is inside you; drag it into the light, out of the closet, into consciousness… it’ll be painful, make no mistake. The demons will shriek; and you’ll be scared.
But I am beginning to think that the demons are more subtle than that. Or deeper, maybe. Or not so black and white, more intertwined with the good stuff in our lives, harder to define, to get a handle on. A couple of weeks ago I went to a friend’s retirement party. It was a fine gathering of people, celebrating David’s many years of ministry in the United Church. A couple of speeches were made, and then it was David’s turn to respond. You think to yourself… make it funny, pithy and short. But instead, we ended up being invited into a strange journey. It began when David started talking about his mother, crediting her for many of the qualities he had just been complimented on. But he also acknowledged that hers had not been an easy life. He talked about her favourite coffee cup complete with slogan…. “Life is tough – and then you die!” But at the bottom there was another line, enclosed in brackets, like an afterthought: “But then you’re at peace –maybe.”
David asked us to think about what peace would look like; what would it feel like, if there were an opportunity to be at peace with all the various selves that have combined tobecome the person you are today… you as a child, a teen, a student, a lover, a parent, a worker, a player, an elder…. the you from those moments and years that you’d rather forget; the moments of joy, bliss even. The moments of pain, distortion, hurt. And, what would it be like to gather together all those people who had been part of your life; what if they could all talk to you, and to each other. What if there could be understanding, honesty, laughter, forgiveness, reconciliation… what would it be like to be at peace with all the people in your years of living.
And he began to ask us to do just that, in what suddenly became a holy moment, a holy space. Remember your father, your mother; biological, adopted, step. Call them into your memory; give thanks; and acknowledge grief. See the ways you fitted together, the good… and the not so. Call up your brother, your sisters, and your childhood together and your years of connection and disconnection when youhave all scattered from home; think of the partners they might have brought into the family; their children, your nephews and nieces. Remember your grandmother, grandfather, your aunts and uncles and cousins. Bring into this moment you lovers, partners, spouses, husband, wife … and the ex’s; oh, and call up the children; all the children who’ve blessed your days, and who are hungry for your wisdom and your love. What would you say to them, when they’re little, when they’re older? Into this holy space name your friends, old and young; longtime and new, how they touched you and changed you; remember your teachers, your mentors; ministers, doctors, counselors. Bring into this room your neighbours, where you live, where you shop. And then add all the people who in some way are connected to the clothing you’re wearing – from the rich son-of-a-gun who knew who how to work the system, to all the workers from China, India, Vietnam, Korea; or for some of you, maybe Italy and France; or the United States; or even Toronto.
The space gets crowded, so full of memory, all the different facets of you; all the people you’ve travelled with, who crossed your path. There will be joy, and sadness; and I suspect that you’ll find some demons in the mix, or at least you’ll catch clues about how they were born, and where they took root within you.
I wonder if the kind of peace that David was talking about, that his mother was hoping for, is the kind of healing that Jesus brought about. We hear the story of the man possessed… indeed, so many demons that when struggling to name them, he could only shout out Legion…. Many. And Jesus healed him… “sozo”… that’s the Greek word used. Could be translated as “healed” or “saved”. It has something to do with a new wholeness; something of the healing, forgiving, loving energy that was embodied in Jesus was offered to this man… and it sent his demons packing.
I wonder if the same thing can happen for us. Maybe we can open ourselves up to this grace… be vulnerable, honest, name what is truly within us; call up the memories, the people, with all their gifts and burdens; and then pray, put it out there… what is that may have kept us alive back then, but now prevents us from living? Where do we need to change? And perhaps we might discover a Spirit, a Holy Energy, a Love that embraces us, that helps us work towards reconciliation, that brings a peaces that passes understanding. Choose the name for this… God, Higher Power, Creator, Father, Mother, Ground of Being, Holy Spirit… Christ. And choose the word that best describes what it is that you are longing for, that will loosen the grip of your demons --- acceptance, liberation, forgiveness, freedom… sozo… healing and salvation. Wholeness.
And as you sit with that, remember that Christ is also offering this grace, this new and abundant life, to everyone around you. Now that’s remarkable…. A new community. Yes, it will be difficult… God knows what the modern equivalent of 500 pigs charging over the cliff would be… it sure seemed to have upset folk back then. Five hundred pigs? – that’s a lot of money. Frankly, it’s better for business if change doesn’t occur; so Jesus, please leave town, leave us alone, don’t hassle the demons. On the other hand… that taste of peace, of life as it could be lived… that is so appealing; behold, the Kingdom of God is at hand. Hold onto this; remember the promise; don’t let go when the demons try to make a comeback. Trust that God is always gracious, and is continuously present in our lives, working towards wholeness… of each and every person, of the entire creation.